Winston Yeung | How To Find Connection Through Writing

The publishing for profit podcast is brought to you by Ghostwriters and co. Earn more money by publishing better content and learn how do we increase your thought leadership so you can build your brand. Head over to ghostwritersandco.com for more information that’s ghostwritersandco.com. And now your host, Joel Mark Harris.

Joel: Hello, and welcome to the publishing for profit podcast. This is your host, Joel Mark Harris, and we’re on episode number 34. Today we interview Winston Yeung who is the founder of Wowworks. He is a transformational coach and founded Voice Story, which helps with social isolation, which is very pertinent right now.

He’s also a writer. He writes on blog page called Chasing butterflies. And you can find his work at chasingbutterflies.blog It’s very interesting. I highly recommend you check it out. So we talk a lot about what a transformational coach is, how he works with his clients, some tools that you can use to help see blind spots, dig yourself out of holes that you’ve dug yourself in and basically a lot of self-development tools that you can use in your daily practice. It’s a very wide ranging conversation. Super interesting. And I hope you enjoy

Joel: Winston. Thank you so much for being on the show. How are you today?

Winston: I’m fun, fit and fabulous today.

Joel: Awesome. I have to say, I was thinking, I don’t think I’ve ever met another Winston before so you are the first Winston of met. I love your name. And of course you’re the first Winston on this show. So congratulate.

Winston: Thank you. Thank you.

Joel: So I want to start, I mean, there are so many places that we can start, but, what caught my eye was your blog, which is Chasing Butterflies. and it kind of reminds me of like a Seth Godin sort of feel where, you know, you sort of reminiscing about certain topics life in general, I guess, whatever comes to mind. Can you tell us a little bit about your blog, why you started it?

Winston: three years ago I had a lady crossed my path. Well, in a nutshell, I was on a date waiting for my date to arrive and she was like an hour late. And in that time a lady walked through the door and I was compelled to have the conversation with her, like every fiber of my body said talk to her and I did.

And eventually, she became my guide for the next 10 weeks. And through that process, she taught me how to express, cause I never growing up in the culture and the societal background I was in men don’t share their feelings or their thoughts, not vulnerable at all stoic. And she just chipped away at that until I learned how to express without any fear of judgment, without any fear or anxiety at all. And that’s how it started. Like I always wanted to share, and then my friend goes on ‘you can start a blog,’ but if you’re going to do it why do you do it? And why are you writing? And I’m like, I’m just writing because I want to write and have a place to put it up.

And if that’s your intention then go for it because you’re not seeking external approval from anyone you’re not seeking leadership and all those other parameters. And then I was thinking of a name. And there was a moment where I went back and I fell in love with my guide, but it was a love that was deeper than anything that I’ve ever felt.

Anyone with anyone before and a connection that I’ve never felt like that before. And there was a moment when I realized that being raised in this society where it’s like, Yeah. You find a partner in there. They are yours. You are there as type thing. And I go, if that’s the case and I took me, took her like, you know, held onto her, put her in a cage and metaphorically.

If she was a butterfly and I fell in love with this butterfly and I captured it, is that the same butterfly that I fell in love with? What was it? And if it’s changed, then that I can’t have that happen. So the only way to have this relationship be is to let that butterfly be, and I’m forever chasing butterflies. That’s that’s how I named it.

Joel: And then this is perhaps a bad question, but, I’m curious of where you get your inspiration from. And, and do you have a writing routine where you sit down to write a blog and what thoughts occur that you want to put on to paper?

Winston: It used to be, semi-regular like, I don’t know, I’m going to write something every day. I have stories that. With everything I do during the day there’s a story that I can write about. Some are extreme, like when I feel a massive resonance, I will go and go. I got to go and put this down on something. Then there I’ve noticed, there are times when there are gaps and it’s, and I have lots of these journals sitting around and I journal daily.

So what’s captured on the blog is what I want to put out there. What’s captured in my journal. Isn’t it doesn’t mean I don’t want to share it, but it’s just, this is just captured here. So everything on the blog, I would feel it just has a slight bit more resonance. I don’t want to just put out a little bit more on the public domain, not to say that I’d never transcribed anything, but the inspiration.

Yeah, it’s just like, I’ll sit there and nothing in the story just to start echoing. And I, and I just start, started typing it out and I would say my intention is just to have someone read it and go Hmm. And just think, think about it. Let’s see how that might impact, how they perceive their world a little bit.

Joel: Gotcha. And have you learned anything about yourself during the writing process since you’ve started this and continuing on through the blogging process?

Winston: I’m in a lot less pain for sure. People that you follow from the beginning or people that know of me more. You will, there is, the way that it’s written.

It’s I have a dialogue with myself, like the little kid inside myself. That’s actually the little boy inside me speaking, and I’m literally having a conversation with him. If you read an out of that context, they’re like, well, who the hell is he talking to?

Or what, what the hell is that? But from the beginning, when I started to the writings, now there is a definite I can feel there’s a definite shift in growth in the wording, just the style. what are, there’s more happiness and joy are woven into it and a lot less pain.

Joel: Can you talk a little bit about your journaling process? Do you have a routine where you journal like in the morning or evening? How often, for how long do you journal and a little bit about that?

Winston: I don’t have a, the only standard routine I have is at the end of the day. this evolved over time. So at the top of the page, I write two decisions, positive or negative without judgment that I’ve made so positive. We impacting like me going forward or negativity. Like then I write down five things that I did and that’s purely when someone goes back and says, yeah, I didn’t get anything accomplished.

Do you look back and took out the garbage, walked the dog, you know, So you’ve accomplished something, even though your mindset, you didn’t, how did I, the net and then one small section. How did I give of myself today? How did I improve somebody else’s life by giving without any expectation? Sometimes that’s filled in sometimes it’s blank and then the latest edition at the very bottom is what did I do for myself?

Because we often don’t, you know, I bought myself an ice cream cone. Like I went for a walk and watch the sunset. Like just something that you did for yourself and only for yourself. And then you can see patterns, how often you didn’t do something for yourself. How much gratitude did you give? So I do that daily.

And in terms of entries, sometimes it depends. Sometimes I, I, I write. A lot. Sometimes they don’t write very much so there’s gaps, but there’s no set. I have to, like, I feel if I go, I have to write something and I’m forcing it versus letting a voice inside me speak through the pen. But the daily routine is, I would call it a, almost like a behaviour habit tracker because in the past, like I quit drinking three years ago and I realized.

There was a different pattern. It’s like five. What happened that Monday? I feel like crap. And I like, what’s the pattern. you go out on a vendor all the time. Okay. Well, if I never started to have that first drink on Friday night, then what happens? And it was all captured there, hard evidence. So that, that really helped.

Joel: Gotcha. Is there anything surprising that you discovered through the journaling process?

Winston: Yeah, there’s a, there’s a lot. I don’t know the realm your listeners are in, if they’re super pragmatic. I have seven voices that echo inside my mind and over time through the journaling, they get a chance to express and from that process. So it’s not saying, ‘Oh, I don’t want to talk to you.’ You’re not important. Ignoring a part of yourself in my, from my experience was a really bad idea because they’re it’s just going to find another way to express itself. So to acknowledge it and just given an opportunity to speak and be heard and the craziest entry I ever had, I would, I would start with a conscious entry about what it was doing.

And then you guys should get into it and you just relax by the time it was done, there was an entry within the entry. So if I highlighted and cut it out, the original entry began and ended, and there was a complete, separate entry in there that the first time that happened, it spooked me. Where did this come from?

Fully formed sentences. The handwriting didn’t change. But when you read it, it like an abrupt change. And then it shifted that. So I’ve learned that there’s more going on than the pragmatic me believed in the past. And journaling has been an outlet to tap into that.

Joel: Awesome. We do recommend journaling for others as a therapeutic exercise.

Winston: Definitely. Definitely. And the difference, how I approach it when I recommended is not to force it. Like if you sit there and you, you know, you, you hold the pen, as you can start by just doing conscious, like, just like you literally are thinking of the words that are going down, but don’t perforate yourself and you sit there and, Oh, I can’t think of anything.

Just walk away. There’s no, by forcing it, you’re just judging yourself. Oh, like I wrote that. Oh, that sucks. It’s not supposed to be a judgment. You journal. So being therapeutic, you just let go and just let it happen. And, and then see what comes out.

Joel: So you’re a transformational coach. Can you tell me a little bit about what that is and who do you help?

Winston: I was introduced to the term a few years ago. I, to be honest with your listeners for the longest time, I never wanted to identify as a coach. it’s just, I just had this really, they’re just weak. Taste when I used it in a friend of mine who is a, he’s a transformational coach. We had this conversation and he said, Winston, you’re identifying coaching a coach with what you see on social media and advertising.

and he goes, well, a lot of those are like inspirational coaches. So they inspire you. But when the. Stop inspiring you, then nothing, nothing happens. And all these other types of coaches, but they’re doing it for those purposes. And like those Facebook ads that you see that pop up to go, 90% of the world is of that.

And then he looked at me and said, you’re different. Like, what am I? You’re a transformational coach. I’m like, what does that mean? You transform people, your intention is to shift them to a better version of them, right? I’m like, yeah, but that’s exactly what I wonder. You know, we are transforming them. They are transformational coach.

And with that new definition, I still don’t use it. I use it and I say it without, any angst anymore, but I. I’m still looking for a better term, but what I do is I hold, I help guide people to see parts of themselves stories, spaces, like, you know, they could be stuck in a hole and not even know that they’re in a hole, but when you realize that you’re stuck in a hole, then you go, well, I want out of a hole, but if you don’t know about it, if you’re blind to all of this, You can’t, you can’t move forward because you’re stuck.

And by guiding people to these spaces of clarity, then we can start doing work to, to move them along their path. And there’s, there’s a lot of people that can’t see where, where they’re at right now.

Joel: How long do you work with people? Is, does transformation take a year? Does it take a couple of sessions? is it a lifelong process?

What’s like, I guess, yeah. What types of transformations do people achieve with you?

Winston: It depends. It varies on the person, obviously. Because of their needs. Some people, some people can experience a moment of transformation in 30 minutes. some people take longer. Now there’s a difference between experiencing a moment of transformation and transformational work because as implied, the second part, it requires work just because I know that.

Okay, bye. I work with you, Joel. And you go, I never knew that it was stuck in this hole. Okay. And I’ll let you know, what are you going to do about it? It’s like, well, I, you can say I like being set in my hole is great. I decorated it. I’m very comfortable in this whole, it’s not for me to say that you shouldn’t be in the hole.

You have to make the decision to say, I want to see what’s outside of this hole. If you want to stay there. that, that, you know, everyone has free will, and it’s not for me to convince you otherwise, but when you go, you know what I want, I want, I want to experience what else is out there, then the work, then, then we do the work.

If you are in a deep hole metaphorically, it’s going to take a little longer for you to get out. I could take weeks, months, even years, but when you get out, then the momentum starts taking. So, if you just kind of just visualize it, you climb out and hold, then you start walking, learning how to walk, learning how to run, then you’re going on.

The marathon runs, but that also takes time to build, build up the skills to do that. But once you’re moving things start happening, but to experience a transformational moment I could, that could be done in a couple of hours. And then you just all, well, I never knew that. I never seen that. And then that’s the beginning, you know, that’s just the first piece of the puzzle.

Joel: Are there common, blind spots or issues that people don’t see that you’ve come across? where they just, yeah, they just don’t see it and you can help them to achieve that clarity.

Winston: very common themes are of a dismissal, abandonment and acknowledgement from, growing up, from our we’re seeking this from our parents and we don’t get it or from society or the typical, who do you think you are?

Or you’re not good enough. and then as we grow up, I said, okay, I’m not good enough. And that. We don’t understand what that really means. We understand what that feels like as kids growing up, but this feeling then manifests into all sorts of crazy stories that we listened to 24 seven in our head and it, and it gut, it shapes our life until we stop it.

but yeah, so as I said to dismissal, abandonment acknowledgement. then the next layer would be like self-worth and self-esteem issues. and then from that, it would go, go to disconnection and I myself hit all over those levels and disconnection and example, which, might resonate with a bunch of people is I didn’t feel, I was told I was never good enough.

So I became an overachiever. But then by overachieving, you set yourself up for massive failures at times. And then when you fail and reinforces that you’re not good enough. And to avoid that pain, I went to alcohol, they’re going to numb it and then you’re running away from it because now it’s chasing you, can’t run away from it for reference and chase.

You let to avoid the pain when it hits, you went further into numbing. And when you numb that much. I didn’t understand when you numb the pain, you also numbed the other side of the spectrum. So you don’t want to feel pain. You’re not going to feel happiness either or enjoy the positive stuff. And then that adds another layer of damage into this cycle of, this vicious cycle that I started spiralling.

Joel: Is this word that you can do yourself or do you need an outside perspective, like a coach to help you through this?

Winston: That’s a tough one. I can’t answer for everyone. I knew I can only answer for myself. I couldn’t have done the work because I didn’t know. I couldn’t see for myself what was broken.

So I needed someone else to. Able to say, first of all, here’s a safe space that you can do the work with. I’ll create the space, I’ll guide you through it, and I’ll show you and equip you with the tools and empower you. But you ultimately have to do the work, but at least I have like, a safe space to, to start from all your it’s really hard to work on yourself.

If you’re running away from demons and dragons and skeletons and. Going through the Indiana Jones temple of doom ride. Right. All the time, while you’re holding on to a rum and Coke in one hand. And not from that, it’s really hard to do the work when your mind and your soul is not clear and in turmoil.

Joel: Hmm. Yeah. I will second that as well, because yeah. It’s, it’s definitely hard to do the work yourself because you don’t know what you don’t know. Right. and I think that’s, again, you know, circling back to journaling, that’s where that comes into, into play is that really helps kind of clarify your thoughts, your feelings, your actions, what have you, is there any other tools or exercises people.

Can use to help, find those blind spots and see, you know, how, you know, I guess, you know, to use your metaphor of the hole, how far in the hole are

Winston: they? there are a couple that come to mind. One, one is, and this is something that people can definitely teach themselves is changed. Learn how to deeply listen.

And what that means is. To where we’re conditioned to listen, to reply, meaning I would say something and then you would have a comment or thought and idea, and it’s locked and loaded and your jaw. And as I’m still speaking, you’re waiting for a pause or a break in order, fire this out to put that aside and just listen, listen with the intent to understand what the other person is saying.

And then from that, You might feel triggered. It’s like, Oh, well you said that that’s really felt uncomfortable. That what that trigger is, is a, it’s a poke into something that you need to resolve a wound, some, some type of pain, they could have spoken about a relationship and then they’re broken. Then all of a sudden you go back to a relationship that you just got out of.

And you’re reminiscing under that. Those are definitely clues as to things that you have to resolve. And the other one is as harsh as it may sound, look at the people that you’re associating with. and I did a harsh exercise. I took, everyone that I knew on a, on a, kind of wrote their name on a plain card.

Or, you know, an index card. I scrambled at them all, put them in a pile and I gave myself two seconds. And the question I would ask is if this person died right now, would it affect my life? And if I had to pause about it, I put them aside, but it was a yes or no. And then it was, believe me, it was a harsh, harsh exercise, especially when it came to a couple and we split.

And I thought, okay, this is going to be really, that’s a really awkward one, but you don’t. But the reason it’s two seconds is you don’t get to think about it. It’s all. It’s all. Heart-based it’s you can choose to go through it again if you want to do another sword, but it really defines who. I would say, is it, I don’t want to say important.

That was the original word who has an impact positive or negative and whatever. That’s, whatever you deem as positive or negative because the polls are now sorted. And then now you can take time. Pick up on Joel’s card and it’s like, what is it about Joel? And then now you can sit down and grab your journals, give me the ax, and just write down.

Now, now you start journaling. What does Joel bring into my life? What does Joel take away from my life? What do I enjoy? And then that’s when the power of journaling comes in because now you can, now you’re allowing yourself to express from a very deep place and then you look back and it’s like, wow. I only see this, but there’s so much more until I wrote it down. I wasn’t, I wasn’t aware of what I didn’t acknowledge.

Joel: That’s interesting. I would imagine not having done the exercise, but you know, a lot of your family members are in, you know, you know, are part of that and prob and can impact you negatively or in a bad way, or, you know, don’t lift you up.

so if you discover, you know, like, okay, this, this person is. You know, you know, found like, again, like a found maybe a family member, maybe a friend, I don’t know, but you know, I think family member, especially, you know, they are not doing you justice. They’re not helping you meet your goals or, you know, live a fulfilled life.

What are something you can do to change that to either. It’s either cut that person out of your life or to try and mend that relationship or make that person a positive impact rather than a negative.

Winston: you first have to ask yourself, what is it that you want from them?

And then the follow-up question, if I was working with someone is what is it that you want? And why is that important to you and for you to make any decisions? You have to honestly answer those two questions and then this is maybe some higher-level stuff, but you also have to be aware of come aware of I’m just going to pick on you.

Yeah. Well, that’s why actually I can’t, because what I’ll, what I’ll describe as, are you okay? yeah. I have a brother, so I might interacting with my brother as who my brother is, or am I interacting with my brother through this creation that I created of who he, I believe he is. So right now, when I’m interacting with you, some part of my brain is creating.

A version of Joel Marquez, because it’s brand new, I’m inter I’m interacting with you, not this version because it’s still being, it’s initially being created, but let’s say after years of interacting with you, this creation can shift over. And now when you say something, it goes through this filter, and then even that you said, Hey, Winston, how are you doing?

What you said and what, what gets translated through aren’t exactly the same thing and vice versa. You are building a version of me if you’re aware of this, or you can consciously put those two aside and interact as who you are and hear the other person for VR. I can say this with certainty because I did that with my mom.

We couldn’t have a conversation before. Definitely, why, like why are you being such a nag and all those things until I really, I saw this and I go, I’m the reason my mom can trigger me as perfectly as she does. I created this version of mom. That was it. it, it, it fits, it’s the suit that fits me right onto my skin.

Like all the pressure points, everything I take this off and put it aside. And when mom says, have you eaten yet? She’s not being condescending and saying, you’re a stupid idiot. You haven’t made lunch for yourself. You haven’t eaten all day. He’s just genuinely concerned if you’ve had anything to eat. And if you haven’t, she’d lovingly make you a sandwich or something a total life-changing moment.

And I love my mom. Don’t get me wrong. It’s not like I hated her. Just we never had, we could never communicate, but I would do anything for my mom. But it’s so much nicer now to be able to have a conversation with her and not get, go off the rails after three, three things or three questions.

Joel: I think that’s actually super powerful because I have a cousin who, I, you know, like good.

We grew up together and I, and I thought of her as a certain way growing up. And, you know, I didn’t particularly like this cousin and, you know, as the cousin grew up and, you know, and she matured and grew to a different person, she, you know, she became somebody else, but I was still interacting. As she was a kid, right.

Not realizing that she was a completely different person than I knew her to be. And it wasn’t until, you know, I had. You know, a couple of, of, you know, different people come into my life and I would describe her in a certain way. And, and they’re like, she’s not like that at all. What are you talking about?

And I had to step back and be like, yeah, you’re right. Actually, that was, that was how she was, you know, 10, 15 years ago, but it’s not her now. That’s a super-powerful tool to use for sure. I don’t know if you want to comment on that or I can move on.

Winston: What you’re describing is very it’s common because when we interact with someone, we really don’t put a timeframe on it.

So we’re interacting with people in snippets. and if we interact with someone that entire time, it’s like, it’s like watching yourself. Age in a mirror. You, you, you don’t because you see yourself all the time. So that, so that almost gets stuck. A lot of, I would say a lot of parents view their children as they have that wonderful certain age.

Like, you know, you’re locked in at 11 and you’re locked in at seven and I’m going to treat you like that for the rest of your life. No different than when we look at our parents when we, so there’s this age differential like I could be in my forties, I look at my mom and I still feel like I’m 10.

Right? So I’m interacting with her through this, through this filter that I’m 10 when I’m, I’m a grown adult. And that really changes things. and to be able to be aware and. Consciously say, you know what, this isn’t my who my cousin is. And then even able to take it to that next level, to have that conversation and vulnerably say, Hey, you know, I, I know we’ve had a really, whatever you want to call it a relationship.

And I just became aware. I’ve always viewed you as this version. And, and. I apologize for that because you’re not, but I always viewed you that way. And then however that for the other person who chooses to take it, they do, you can’t control that, but by releasing that and letting go of that story that we created, it’s liberating for us.

It’s freeing and it’s healing because now it’s, now you can let go of the guilt and shame that you did it for so long and say, you know what? I I’ve said what I need to say. If she doesn’t. You know how however she chooses to take it, but I, I did what I had to do. And then now you can move on and now you have, by letting go of that now created the space for a new experience to come in versus holding onto this regret that you’ve treated her like crap for the last X number of years, because you know, you always viewed her as this.

10 year younger version, doesn’t help you with, by letting it go. Now, a new experience, a new person can come in, fill in that space. It’s like, wow, I haven’t felt this before. Oh, it’s because there’s a new information that’s been given to you. I

Joel: want to talk about your company. Wow. Work specifically. Where does that name from and the Genesis of that, of your company?

Winston: through, through conversations I’ve had with, this, this thing called project connection, where I, I wanted to connect with, I give a hundred dollars of my time to connect with a hundred people. Someone asked me, Hey, Winston, what’s, how’s your project going? What? What’s a common thing. That’s what’s coming up.

And I jokingly said, well, I’ve been having these great conversations and. Every time. I, at the end of the conversation, someone would say, wow. And he goes, that’s what you do. And I went, what do I do? He goes, you create well moments. I’m like, that’s the best way I’ve ever had anyone describe it. And then I shared that with a part of, one of my team as Voice Story and what came out of my mouth.

Was it? Yeah. And I don’t know exact terminology, but it was, I said, I create wow moments, but then there’s work that needs to be done. And then he goes, that’s wow. Work, because, and the reason is giving, a moment of inspiration. If you don’t do any work, it’s just a dream. And if you just do work and you’re not inspired, you’re just doing it.

And you’re never going to be fulfilled. By saying here’s a moment of inspiration and truly defining in our name that there’s work that needs to be done. When you combine the two of them together, you can make the dream come true.

Joel: I think that’s an amazing way to look at it. So have you always wanted to, to create these wild moments or is this something that has kind of cropped up later in your life?

Winston: Definitely cropped up later in my life. I, I started off as a, as an it professional, did that for most of my life. And then I became an entrepreneur, did that for another decade, creating products and manufacturing and coming up with ideas. So it was always, a visionary in bringing something into.

Bringing something out that could benefit people, feeling a need that needed to be filled. It wasn’t until the last few years having done a whole bunch of work on myself, that I realized that I had this aptitude to help guide people to these spaces of clarity, but it wasn’t until very recently that I.

Where I understood. I can guide people to these spaces of clarity, but I’m really having difficulty taking them through the work process. And then, at a conference, a guy said people are, you’re either a visionary. You’re a changemaker as an entrepreneur. You’re wearing both hats, but by, but. Your true essence, your either a visionary or a change maker, a dreamer or a change maker.

And then it all made sense because I, my, the work side, my business partner, Matt, he is the change maker. Like the two of us easily. He’s my easily yang to my year. Like when the two of us are doing magic happens for the client quickly. Because he understands where I’m coming from. I understand where he’s coming from and that the wow of the work just mesh perfectly.

He can’t do what I do and I can’t do what he does. So when he entered into my journey, it was like a perfect fit. And, and only recently that I see that because I, I, I won’t say I struggled, but it was definitely, Like I can paint a house, but if the guy’s a master painter, he has the right tools, the experience, how to tape and everything versus how I do it, I can get it done but am I really serving the client the best versus bringing in someone that really knows how to do it?

Joel: So do you and Matt work on with the client together? Or what does that process look like?

Winston: Yep. It gets passed back and forth. So let’s just say there’s 10 steps. Six of those steps could be to wow while related four could be work-related or to be initial wow moment in nine steps of work. It all depends on the person at the time.

So there’s no, it could be the other way around. He could have be working with someone to do the work, and then all of a sudden goes, why are you working so hard? And then that’s where the wow component comes in and it’s like, Oh, that makes total sense. So it can be, there’s no set starting or endpoint.

It’s just at the end of it. When you’re gone through the process, you understand why you do and. You understand deeply why you do it. I get, it’s so clear that you wake up and there’s nothing else that you want to do. You just go, you’re just inspired you. You want to wake up, you don’t want to sleep in because you look forward to doing something that just, this is bursting from within you. And it’s a powerful space to be.

Joel: That’s awesome. I want to talk about, you mentioned voice story. And so that’s a conference that is about, social isolation, which I think is a very pertinent topic right now. But can you tell us a little bit about Voice Story and why you decided to find found it?

Winston: It’s a foundation I created but Voice Story initially started off as a platform.

I was born from my dysfunctional belief that I needed permission to speak. And it took a while for me to overcome this. And then I came to thought, I can’t be the only one on this planet that has this dysfunctional belief that they need permission to speak. So I’m going to create a safe platform and I’m going to give permission for people to speak.

And, so it’s a live storytelling event where I have a curated. And these are just normal people. Like you don’t have to have written a book or have credentials. You just normal people that want to share a moment of their lives, a specific story in order to impact another person that’s stuck in that same space and

how it started and where, where, how it continued to evolve was fascinating. the depth of the stories, the people that were, that were resonating with it, the feedback we were getting, it was great. And we, we saw the healing power of it as well. then, and then COVID hit and everything got full stop and through COVID, that’s actually how, while work was focused, because what I realized is.

Working with someone developing and, and weaving their story together was just a very focused application of while work. And then when I, when I saw it, I was like, that makes total sense. While work is, is a much broader scope someone’s coming to me. They have no idea what’s going to happen. You come to me for the story.

I already have a starting space. And then, and then away we go. but voice story is to combat the effect, the visible effects of social isolation, where you’re sitting by yourself, the team on yourself with the lights are off and you’re like, no one, no one gets me. No one cares. Like, why am I even bothering whatever the story is, by hearing someone else share their story.

And then it resonates with you and then you go, the key thing is you realize that you’re not alone. You’re not the only one. And most of all, you’re not broken. And then that gives a moment to stop the cycle. And then when you experienced the whole story and the person at the end, you see that as possible.

Now you see that. This, this isn’t it. I can, I can this person achieved it. I can achieve that. I’m going to reach out to the person and say, can you tell me what you did because I want to be there. And everyone that shared the stage, all they want is to save someone from the pain. not, not from the pain they feel, but from like the months and years of pain.

I’m being stuck in that space by saying, look, I got out, you don’t have to stay there for another X number of period of time. You can choose to go at two and you go, I choose and away you go. And that’s the core of why my story came to be. Hmm.

Joel: What are some of the stories that have continued, or you remember the most.

Winston: It was, there’s a lot. There’s a lot of the ones I share all the time or on the curiosity, about how to, how to engage with other people and be aware of our own, filters about worthiness. And especially about mental health, like, mental health, major theme. And we have all types of speakers speaking about it.

And it’s not about one. So we have people from the industry where people from the, from the healthcare provision, profession, we have just regular people sharing how. How they struggled being just massively depressed, how they almost wanted to kill themselves, how they disconnected, how they became addicted to alcohol and substances because of what was going on.

Then it just hits, it hits such a wide swath of people

and they go, I want to hear very often is thank you. I really needed to hear that. Because they were afraid to express to anyone, but now seeing someone else with a take the courage to express, it gives them the courage to if nothing else acknowledged for themselves that yeah, I want to change and then they can go and reach out to someone else, in the future.

So. I resonate. There’s, there’s a lot of beautiful stories that I got to experience and through project connection, very, very much the same thing. get to experience, a snapshot of people’s lives.

Joel: What is Project Connection?

Winston: So as you could probably, understand when I work with someone’s story it’s out of here. Is that a deep, personal, authentic, and vulnerable level. So I can really get to connect with the person. And then I, I see them grow. I see them shift to see them change. I see them change a lot when I give them the mic and I get the mic back and I see it see a different person. So when COVID hit, I didn’t understand that I was doing that on a daily basis.

And then it all stopped. And even though I’m still working with people in their story, it was this constant amount of it’s like, I’m just, I don’t want to say feeding, but I was just immersed in this space and now it’s gone and it took me to a very dark, took me to a dark space. And then I realized, okay, well, I’ll wait on a creep.

That’s this space again? Well, let’s, let’s just go and ask people. They want to have a conversation and the intention is not to go and do coaching work on them. It’s just to have a conversation with them, just to say, Hey, what’s on your mind. And, and away you go. And just to connect on a, just an authentic level and because we can’t do it in person that often anymore. And it’s been very fulfilling to have to do that.

Joel: So back to voice story, you said it was full stop when COVID hit. Is there a plan? Because I think if anything else, voice story is. So needed right now because you know, I know I feel isolated. It’s, you know, we talked before we went on air, we talked about how much time we spent on zoom.

And it’s not the same as sitting down having a cup of coffee with somebody. right now, as, as we record, we’re not actually allowed to go to somebody else’s house.

I think social isolation and the, you know, the mental wellbeing of a person that comes with that, social isolation is, is so important, especially now.

So, you know, having said that, is there are there plans of expanding or bringing it back or putting it online or what basically, what are the next steps? if any, for a voice start.

Winston: Well what story live? The live show is on hold because for COVID reasons, I did spend months looking at streaming technology to put it online, but a part of me, as I started doing the research part of me really resisted putting it online.

I couldn’t put my finger on it until I started having conversations with people that I spoke and people that were in the audience. And there are certain things that can’t be captured on a virtual show that were happening in the live event. One of which that was shared was the hug. It’s like when the person was finished speaking, they’re standing there, they give the mic back.

And I, and I embraced them. They said that that’s, that was one of the best parts of the show. And like, I couldn’t wait to see that happen. You can’t do that virtually. And. For me also, I don’t believe someone can get to the depth of authenticity and vulnerability sharing that story if they’re sitting in the comfort of their own home, because there’s just too many triggers, smells things that would just hold them back.

But by going to a venue, Now you’re outside now, you’re in a different space. so that’s just on hold some voice story live. We’ll, we’ll come back in the future, but in the meantime to it, I finally taken the steps to create a podcast, to have those types of conversations. maybe I, you know, I don’t know how they’re going to evolve, but it’s a space where.

The conversations need to be had. And one of the key things about voice story is we’re having conversation and talking about things that most people don’t talk about, like vulnerability and loss and grief and shame, like dark topics. like why can’t we talk about suicide? And here are people, you know, What was going on and just, just to give voice to it and to have discussion around it.

And I believe doing that through the podcast and say, okay, the theme this month is mental health and wellness. And then the some topic of suicide and away you go and just having people bring it up. So it takes away the spectre. That whole, we can’t talk about, we can’t talk about this. It’s being talked about, spoken about, so it normalizes it.

Joel: And have you launched the podcast yet?

Winston: I’m not going to say hope I will launch it next Wednesday. We recorded the first one and it’s just a matter of announcing it. So your listeners would be the first people to. To get noticed it’s called Stop, Reflect and Talk

Joel: Sorry, stop reflecting?

Winston: Stop, Reflect and Talk.

Joel: I love it. I love that name. Yeah. So what, I’m going to wrap it up with just one last question. And that is, do you have a favorite book or one that you like to gift a lot?

Winston: Wow. The one that comes to mind is

it’s actually a fantasy novel. I don’t remember the title of it. It’s by Margaret Weis and Tracy Hickman. It’s a seven-book series called the decade cycle and it’s just, it’s the first book. I don’t have the name on hand and I gift that book a lot because it, for me, I love reading books where I can create a world and it’s such those two authors are such amazing world builders. So it took seven books to build this world and take it to an end to its ending. And I’ve, I’ve gifted book one to people to start them on that journey a lot.

Joel: And what’s the, so I guess this is this, the real last question is what’s the premise of the

Winston: book. The premise of the book was, I guess it’s actually relative, relative to current events.

It’s about two factions fighting over control of the world. So one side just decided to break the world into its four elements. So the first four, so it’s like earth, air, water, and core. The first four books talk about each separate world. And then the last three books. Talk about how the three worlds find out about each other and then start to, Integrate again.

Joel: Winston, thank you so much for being on the show. I really appreciate it for people who want to reach out to you. maybe they want to try some coaching sessions. maybe they want to listen to your upcoming podcast. Where can they find you?

Winston: You can find me at wowwork.me. And if you want to reach out to me, it’s winston@wework.me. Who would like to have a chat and see where that goal is. You just go to the website and book a call that way.

Joel: Awesome. And, look out for the new podcast as well. And can you just remind our listeners and viewers what the title of that is?

Winston: Yeah, the podcast. Well, now that I’m putting it out time to test out, so it’d be, launched next Wednesday. So that would be what the 17th.

Joel: I think. Yeah.

Winston: And, the podcast is called Stop, Reflect and Talk.

Joel: Stop, Reflect, and Talk. I love it. Well, thank you so much, Winston, and enjoy the rest of your day.

Winston: Thank you. Pleasure.